one of those good nights

today went perfect. almost. but you know it's cause nothing's perfect. i went to Golden Coral and to the movies with Kim, Linda and Marisol. it was great because i ate healthy food...somewhat. and i got lost going to the bathroom l0l. but it was still a great night. and after we went to see the haunting in Connecticut. that movie got me so scared Emma and Madonna are sleeping with me tonight. and i barely want them in my room. they're right next to me right now. but it was good. I'll probably get over it tomorrow. I'm listening to Adele right now typing this. i LOVE her. and after the movies there were these HOT boys outside of the movie theater l0l. and we took pictures. after that i came home and my parents were in a good mood so they're letting me use the laptop. which is where I'm typing all of this. i guess i'm happy because the day didn't end badly.

I also got really into slam poetry. i cannot stop watching some people. someone like Rafael Casal should be famous, as a matter of fact all of them should be famous because they deserve to be. they are so freaking talented that i don't even know why they live in this corrupt world. It's like they need to live in another world. Their view on life and women and children are so freaking amazing i just wish every boy was like them it would make the world so much better. or a woman's world so much better. and some of them are pretty hot too. i would recommend ANYONE to get on youtube and to just type in Def Slam Poetry and you'd be amazed at what you hear. I'm going to do one soon so just keep an open eye l0l. all right I'm done with blogging. i gotta go and watch some more people on youtube.

Blaze is FORCING me to BLOG!

ok so here i go blogging about my nonsense life and my destroyed mentality. I'm going to use many metaphors or simile or whatever in this post.(ok so i realized i didn't use a lot throughout the rest of the blog) why? because i feel like it and i realize i truly have a deep hate in my heart. it comes out little by little. i realized it i think the day before yesterday. so i decided to change. I'll just fade into the background and not talk and just be the quiet little good girl i always was.

so i have a new obsession besides Asian boys. haha . as a matter of fact i don't like Asian boys all that much anymore. and i got over a LOT of people i used to like. including the old dude haha =D and all the other people i told you guys about.

i don't really have anything to talk about besides the fact that i hate my parents and i want to go to Oxford university so i can be thousands of kilometers away from them when i graduate.

so i changed my diet. yeah i'm trying to go with three HEALTHY meals a day and 2 snacks in between. healthy snacks. as soon as i get that down i'm going to start the exercising. and i heard of this park not too far away from where i live so i'm going to be running there from now on. man i need to blog about something interesting.

well here is the dude i've fell madly in love with l0l














and HIS BUTT!!!



ok now that that's over with I'll tell you about this book i read recently. it's about guys and girls. well their relationship basically. and it was just there. laid out for me like a dead body's debris haha. so i'm learning a lot about that. basically guys are dogs who like the way a girl looks. they like to "do" stuff with nice looking girls. they are so different than us in soooooo many ways. and in the book these girls are just so desperate to keep their boyfriends that they let the boys beat them around. it's horrible and stupid. at the same time there are those girls who are independent and know what they want.
there are also many kind of boys: the bad boys, the good ones, the players, the pretty boys and so on. and basically when i read it it made em realize how LONELY i was l0l. no seriously though. like all these girls have soooooooo many boyfriends and i'm here getting older and i could count all of my boyfriends with one hand. i hope this doesn't make me sound sound sorry for myself because i'm not but it made me just realize how pitiful my life is. if that last statement didn't make sense ot anyone then just pretend like you didn't read it at all. and well what i'm basically worried about is catching the wrong boy....or falling for the wrong one. IF i get any at all.
and that's by blog because i don't really know how to word the rest of my thoughts and i'm getting frustrated so bye.

Shawty i BE Bl0GGiN!

lmao ignore the title.
this is my 3rd blog. i think. hold up let me check again.

yes it is in fact my third blog. man i so don't do much on this site.
well today was a good day so i thought I'd write a little before going to sleep.
Yesterday we had no school because of the snow. it was awesome and i want to upload the video i made in the snow but then i gotta edit it, upload it on youtube, wait for the crap to process then copy AND then PASTE it on here. too much work l0l.
anyways so today i made a new friend. she's really nice. no i take that back. that girl is sarcastic as i don't know what but she's funny. i talked to her before but today i realized i have a LOT in common with her. (even though she's the spawn of the devil l0l) and it was nice talking to her.

AND OMG I ALMOST DIED TODAY!! MY AP TEACHER WASN'T THERE!!! AND I MISSED HIM SO MUCH LMAO!

but other than that I'm ok. i saw a quote on photobucket i think? and it said, "you have to be happy, if you are then everything else will fall into place."
and I'm just now realizing it's kind of true. Because if i decide I'm going to have a good day, i most of the time do. but if i don't. It ends up being a depressing day, so I'd like to share that.

This is such a boring blog. i have nothing else to say. ughhh and i thought I'd write a lot. OK now let me think......oh yeah now i know EXACTLY what I'm going to write about!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


i don't think I'll be hanging out with Dex much longer...or anymore. Because they're like corrupting me. It's true what they say about bad character corrupting the good one. i thought for once it would go the other way around but it DIDN'T!!
i found myself cursing this weekend. and i Don't even curse. i found myself saying all sort of stuff too. like wtf? doesn't make any sense. and then i realized that i get most of it from him.
NO see i like me the way i was in 9th grade (partially). i like NOT cursing and being good and all that other crap. Now i feel this power within me like i can shut anybody down or belittle anyone and i can do whatever the freak i want.
and i mean i can but i feel this thing, and it's bad because i was daydreaming about fighting someone today. i know i know, I'm weird. and i don't want to say this in fear of offending someone but i feel like a PAGAN! i mean i am but you know i always felt this innocence to me.
now i feel like I'm losing ALL of it.
matter of fact ignore everything i typed. that's what I'm trying to say.
"I Feel Like I'm Losing My Innocence."
that's basically what I'm trying to say. and no, not in the "sex" way. But just in general. I'm loosing the sweet nice girl and becoming a monster drawn by other people.
So from now on I'll try my hardest to not hang out with people that influence me the wrong way because i DO NOT want to become something I've always avoided.
you know what i mean?
well that's pretty much my blog.

and oh I'll be praying for my AP teacher in surgery. can you believe he has Hernia? I thought i was gross but I'll live =]]